#I don gaa time

High school. We love it, we hate it, we want it to last forever and ever. Why is it that alumni always seem to say high school was one of the worst 3 years of my life. Teacher's are constantly on your asses, parent's too. But friends? You can say i'm loser for admitting that when I grow up, I don't want to look back on my life and say: "I wish I would have tried harder, instead friends and gossip problems were my main focus." I don't want to. I want to be able to grow up and look at my struggles as something that made me stronger. And no, I'm not saying I'm a good person. I'm not saying I'm a bad person either, but I do know what my priorities are, and that's a start. You know, every year in a high school someone dies. May sound cheesy but you know its true. You could call someone a fag one day and idiot the next, and the following day they would be dead. Suicide. People, what is the point of hate? I get it, we're all human, we fight, we make up. But why go on with your life just hating the world? You may not know it but your little harsh words go far. Someone in your school dies that you absolutely hated. You hated the way they dressed, the way they looked the way they talked everything. Grade 12 year they're gone. Now what? You feel good about yourself now? Now that the person you told every day that he or she was an idiot a loser, an ugly fuck, a slut, whatever, is now dead your happy? You would have to be inhuman to be happy after that. So here's my point, why are people so harsh like this. I don't know about you, but i've got a lot of stuff going on in my life right now. Maybe stuff that you couldn't even imagine. We've all got our struggles, so why do you have to worsen someone elses day on top of that. I don't get it. I've done it before. I've tried to make people feel like they were worthless, nothing. And I look back on those people, and I feel sick to my stomach. Half those people I don't even know where they are right now. I've actually got that feeling right now. I think about all the people that are in my life right now. I can't imagine losing anyone right now or ever, especially by the way things are.
I'd be a fool to tell you friend's don't matter in high school. Cause they do.
"Yeah, I've got a lot of aquaintences, but I don't have a lot of friends."
-Najiba Yasmina

I think that's what I haven't realized all these years. Sure, we've known each other for some time. But that doesn't necessarily mean we are friends. And that's okay. Cause in the real world, you meet people your not going to like, that doesn't mean you gotta make their lives a living hell. I wish people In my school understood that. Or at least some people. But a wish is just a wish, I can't change people, cause for all I know I could be completely wrong to other people. But that's okay, it works for me.
I've been walked all over on, I've been used, and blah blah blah. But I always keep this in mind to those people who cause me pain, anger, and unwanted stress; If your main priority is to "beak" me bring me down, tell me I'm this and that, then I feel sorry for you, cause unfortunately that's all your ever going to be, your the person I'll be giving my bottles to when I see you on the street corner on your way to the bottle depot down by 17th ave. Your going to be that person. Not me.
My dad always told me never to argue with a fool, cause it will be 20 minutes of your life you will never get back. Unfortunately, I've argued with one to many fools.
So basically my point to all of this is, high school isn't where your going to be spending the rest of your life (unless your going to be a teacher) its merely just the beginning of life. So if that's how you wanna start, go ahead no one is stopping you or mocking you for it. But don't expect to get very far.